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Social Media Helped Me Love Myself

Discussion in 'Share Your Story' started by Jessica, Jan 5, 2017.

  1. Hi there, friends! I'm Jess and I'm (kinda) new to this site, so please bear with me!

    My body positivity journey started three years ago, when I was 15 years old, and the main reason is the same reason that so many people have confidence issues: social media. Now, that's not to blame social media for everything, but I think we can all agree that the internet can be a dark, very disturbing place full of bullies and trolls. In a world where fat bodies are constantly seen as something people should be ashamed of, the mix of bullying and hatred with endless images of models with society's "ideal" body shape took a great toll on my self-esteem... which is why it was so weird to me that this is when I started my YouTube channel. Well, I actually already had my channel, but this when I decided to make my channel more about plus size fashion, rather than beauty and makeup. It was a really big deal for me to even admit that I was plus size, even though anybody with eyesight could see that I was.

    I, like most plus size women, grew up with the constant fear that somebody would call me fat. When I was about seven or eight years old, I was at summer camp when I got paired up with this boy from my class to participate in an obstacle course race. I was so scared that he would make a comment about my weight in front of all of the other kids in our camp... and lo and behold, he did. He made some comment similar to "I don't wanna partner with her, she's fat!" or something along those lines, but it just further traumatized me and made me hate my body even more. I consequently ran to the bleachers, in the back corner of the gym, and started crying. Throughout the years, I received several comments about my weight, whether it was a classmate calling me fat or a family member asking me when I was going to lose some weight. So, back to fifteen year old me, it was a big deal for me to admit to myself that I was fat. It was hard to admit that yes, I do shop in the plus size section at clothing stores. Yes, I weigh more than my friends.

    I was putting myself out there on the internet, for everyone and anyone to judge me, when I wasn't even comfortable in my own skin. However, I eventually found the body positive community on YouTube and Instagram, and that's when I finally began my self-love journey. Following all of the plus size queens of social media like Nadia, Gabi, Tess, Nicolette, and a lot lesser known bloggers made me realize that learning to love my fat body wasn't impossible. It's a lot of work, but it wasn't impossible.

    I grew up in Miami, aka Satan's butthole, but I never wore any kind of bottoms other than yoga pants or skinny jeans cause I absolutely refused to wear anything that showed my legs. To be honest, I'm still not entirely sure how I didn't sweat to death, cause constant 85+ degree weather and tight skinny jeans do NOT mix well. But I finally started wearing dresses and skirts. I started to experiment more with my style and bought things that I actually liked, rather than things that just covered up my body. Now being called fat doesn't bother me and I actually show off my body shape on Instagram... 12 year old me must be like "what???" To sum up this super long intro, I'm finally way more confident than I've ever been, because screw beauty standards. Wear what you want, and flaunt it, because you're beautiful! It doesn't matter what people think because there will be always be critics, no matter what you look like, and your opinion of yourself is the only opinion that matters! Your weight and a number on a scale does not define you. Your intelligence, compassion, kindness, strength, sincerity, creativity, etc... those things are what define you. You can be fat and still slay. You can be thin and still slay. You can work it at any size, because your weight doesn't determine your worth or who you are!

    Anyways, I hope this essay was interesting enough! I'm so glad to have joined this wonderful community and I can't wait to talk to some of you babes!
  2. Absolutely LOVE your story Jessica!!!!!

    You are way ahead of me and many of us because you are figuring this out at 18 years of age when many of us don't figure it out until we are in our 30's or 40's.

    Isn't it ironic how social media is often the source of your pain but you then turned it into a positive by following the right BoPo leaders and then even showed your strength with a YouTube channel!!!!

    Wow! You must be soooooo proud of yourself!

    I would love of you to post your favorite YouTube video here so we can check it out! Just click the film icon and use the share url to post!

    Can't wait to see!

    What has been the best thing to come out of your YouTube channel?
    Jessica likes this.
  3. Girl! I know that struggle of wearing full-length pants in the summer. This year I marched my hiney to Torrid and bought my first pair of shorts since childhood. And I loved how I looked AND felt in them! We traveled to New Orleans in June (SO HOT!!) and I went sleeveless for the first time in my adult life. I can't believe the comfort that I'd been depriving myself of all my life!
    Finding women who looked like me on Instagram completely changed my life, too! I know we can use social media for evil but it's revolutionized my whole life. Sometimes when I want to wear something that I ordinarily wouldn't allow myself to wear but I need a little confidence, I'll cruise certain hashtags to remind myself that confidence makes everything look good.
    Jessica, Dubbage42 and BoPo Team like this.
  4. Lololol Satan's butthole.
    Okay sorry, had to get that out of the way.
    Don't you wish you could just go back and be your 12-year-old self's best friend?
    I know I do.
    I'm so glad you've come as far as you have and I'm so happy you're part of this community.
    Jessica and BoPo Team like this.
  5. It really is ironic! And the best thing to come out of my YouTube channel is definitely the amazing body positive, plus size women that I've met! I have a close group of plus size friends that I've met through YouTube, and they're all so inspirational and fabulous! Another extremely great result of my channel has been all of the girls/women that have told me how much I've helped their self-esteem. Girls will message me and tell them that I inspired them to do or wear something that they'd usually never do/wear, and that's an amazing feeling! <3
    BoPo Team and Corinne Santiago like this.
  6. Omg yay, congratulations love!! I'm so proud of you! And I completely, completely relate! I seriously cannot believe that I've gone all of these years, living in extremely sunny Miami, and I've never wore a dress... the comfort difference is INSANE. And that's exactly how social media has helped me! Whenever I feel a little self-conscious or something, I'll scroll through a body posi babe's page and it makes me feel so much better :)
    BoPo Team likes this.
  7. Ugh, I really really do! And thank you so much, love! I'm so glad to be apart of this community :)
    BoPo Team and Corinne Santiago like this.
  8. I love this story! You are an inspiration and I hope social media sharing continues to help you on your self love journey. :)
    BoPo Team likes this.

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